5 Ways You’re Setting Your Marriage Up to Fail
Do you have a great relationship with your spouse? Do you think that nothing can ever tear you guys apart? Well, many failed marriages start off with that mindset until they begin to make these mistakes. Take preemptive measures to prevent your marriage from becoming a statistic in divorce. Here are 5 mistakes many couples make that kill their marriage.
First things first, your relationship with your spouse should be cultivated everyday. You and your spouse need to do everything you can to keep the love between you guys alive. To overcome adversity in life that threatens your marriage, you need to fight it as if your fighting for your life. Make sure you avoid doing these things below if you want a harmonious, thriving, satisfying and loving marriage.
1. Overcommitment to Extracurricular Activities and Stress
Although it’s not impossible (many busy people can still have a thriving marriage) but extensive and stressful activities outside your marriage can deteriorate your relationship with your spouse. Young couples, especially, have a difficult time balancing school, children, starting a business, renovating a house, and work to their relationship. Many marriage fall apart when both couples are too busy to spend time together to cultivate their relationship. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do things outside your marriage. Just be sure to find a good balance between the activities in your life outside your marriage and time with your spouse.
Can you imagine a man who spends more time at work than he does with his wife ? If he doesn’t cultivate the bond he has with his wife on a daily basis, his wife is more likely to build resentment and loneliness (especially if he’s too tired to connect when he gets home). It’s crucial to take time out of your day to connect with your spouse.
2. Are Your Fulfilling Your Spouse’s Needs?
Are you a giver or taker? If a relationship consist of two takers, their marriage is going to suffer. Selfishness has no place in a marriage. Be aware of your spouse’s needs as well as they are aware with yours. A marriage where both couple’s highest needs are met will overcome any adversity that dares to threaten a marriage. On the other hand, two givers in a marriage are set to have a successful and thriving marriage. Most marriages that fail is usually due to one (if not both) spouse not meeting their spouse’s needs. Think about, do you think a couple who fulfills each other’s emotional and physical needs have many problems in their marriage?
3. Do You Have Unrealistic Expectations
Many couples go into a marriage with a certain expectation that only sets up their spouse to fail. Women are culprits when it comes to this. Many women have high expectations of their husband. Most of these high expectations are from what they’ve learned through the media. These women have predetermined romantic notions of what their marriage should be. Some husbands do this too. Instead they have expectations of a domesticated wife who will do all the cooking, cleaning and household chores in the house. Make sure your expectations are realistic. Your not living in a fantasy world where your life is a movie. You are only setting yourself up for major disappointment. Keep your expectations realistic.
4. Living with the In Laws
Living in the same household with your parents or your in-laws while your married is asking for trouble. It’s really difficult for parents to let go of the feeling of authority they have over their children. If you are living with your spouse under your in-laws roof, keep in mind that great difficulties may lie ahead and challenge your marriage.
5. Spacial Problems
Couples who don’t give their spouse space is a problematic concern. If you don’t allow your husband or wife the space they need, the attraction between you guys is set to suffer. Time for yourself is a great way to keep the relationship fresh. A successful couple consist of both people who feel successful outside their relationship. If you have low self esteem and lack of trust issues, your marriage will also deteriorate. Jealousy can be the kiss of death in many relationships if it’s not controlled or dealt with. In order for a couple to succeed, their love must be confident and free of limiting beliefs.
These are 5 things that can ruin your marriage. Truth be told, there are many ways a marriage is set to fail. If you want to do everything you can to live a satisfying and loving marriage, you need to also keep these 4 things in mind. Communication. Trust. Passion. Commitment. These 4 things make up the foundation to a lasting marriage that will give you a fighting chance to survive any adversity life may throw at you.